the Margin

Why Me.

I haven’t written in awhile. Most of my well-intentioned musings are stored in opaque jars on a shelf called, “I’ll get to it someday.” Occasionally, I’ll get one down, turning the dusty jar with tired hands, opening the lid and examining the contents as if it were a spice I could still use for cooking. Some have expired. Even if I were to extract the contents, the meaning is long gone, trapped within the recesses of my memory—forever. It is complicated being a writer. My thoughts start to build into entire essays when all I want to do is put down the right sentence before the turn of phrase eludes me. I miss the words. Spun just right, I am a weaver of silk that can touch the senses with delicate thread and soft colors. You will remember me in the lasting impression of lightness and texture you cannot explain. It is a gift and one that I am grateful for, if only for a place to rest my tumbled thoughts, the pillow that cradles my head crisp and white underneath the boldness of black Arial font. I recently decided to open a jar, shaking lose the fragments of another time, working to piece them together in the present.

Continue reading Why Me.

Things I Remember Living in Hanoi, 1996

  1. Dirt road to and from the airport.
  2. Large numbers of policeman with AK47s.
  3. Not going to Ho Chi Minh’s mausoleum.
  4. Bun Cha Nem.
  5. Hoa Sua and chocolate croissants.
  6. Drinking cafe sua non on the balcony of a hostel in Sapa before the fog rolled out of the valley.
  7. Hiking to Fansipan with an Excalibur-like moment that included a horse riding off into the fog.
  8. 306-no home.
  9. Cyclos that were actually necessary transportation.
  10. Amoebas.
  11. Being the wrong color.
  12. The squealing of a pig on a motorbike.
  13. The squeak of tennis shoes on a makeshift badminton court.
  14. Civilians lining up for military exercises at 5:30 AM in the field across from where I lived.
  15. The woman selling her food at 5:00 AM in a sing-song voice.
  16. The day a dog got stolen from the neighbor.
  17. The day a dog got run over by a motorbike.
  18. Learning nothing.
  19. Learning everything.
Photo: Sapa, 1996